Boundaries for the Holidays: Family, Different Values & Practicing Acceptance

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Break tradition, say no & honor your own needs this season.

 

Family. Friends. Parties. And, omg-how-many-more-times-do-I-need-to-wear-heels? Sometimes we need a reminder to say no, practice our boundaries and accept others the way they are (because the differences between you and your family can really surface during the holidays). This season can bring up a lot of emotion, self-comparison, differences in values, and pesky questions that you're tired of hearing. 

In this episode, we talk about doing what feels right for YOU instead of relying on old traditions that may no longer serve you. (Maybe you've out-grown some past traditions or you're so burnt-out and can't imagine doing one more round of caroling). We also touch on the importance of accepting people where they are at on their own journey (versus making sure everyone else reads Jen Sincero and takes as many notes as you). And lastly, we talk about boundaries and simply loving your family for who they are (instead of gettin' all preachy this season). 

 

In this episode, you'll learn:

 

- How to use the love languages to gift people in the way they want to be gifted. (+ To try loving people in the way that they want to be loved).

- That even though others might be doing stuff blatantly wrong, you need to let them do their own thing. They will find the work at the right time for them. (In the same way that you found the work at the right time for you).

- Understand that people value different things, especially money, time, and lifestyle habits. This holiday season, learn how to be non-judgemental towards those family members who are totally different than you.

- How to practice not being judgemental and respect that other people and family members do things differently than you.

- How to use boundary statements this holiday, specifically around those pesky questions which family notoriously likes to ask. 

- That if you're tired of answering certain questions or if you don't enjoy talking about specific topics, that this is a great place to use a boundary statement.

- Why it's important to decide your boundaries in advance, so when someone asks you a hot-button topic, you aren't squirming around.

- Why it's important to break the holiday traditions that no longer serve you. If it's not working, you don't need to keep doing it, even if you've done it that way for years.

- That sometimes, we can get stuck in the mindset of "this is the way it needs to be done, this is how we've done it forever, and this is the way we need to keep doing it." (+ How to take a "hall pass" for this year if needed).

 

 

Resources mentioned:

 

The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

The free 5 love languages quiz

Rock Your Bliss

You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero

German Advent Calendar Tea (this is where I got the "white fountain of inspiration tea")

 

Find Kelly:

 

Instagram: @kellytrach

kellytrach.com


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